This post is waayyy overdue, but my first trimester was a little rough and I was just tryin' to hang on!
The break *did* give me a long time to form a good idea of what frugality means/looks like to me. And it actually has a lot less to do with money than I ever would have imagined.
Most of the time, when people are talking about being "frugal", they are actually talking about being "cheap". I know, that doesn't sound very flattering- but I think it to be rather true. Frugality is about RESOURCES- and how they are used. It is about being resourceful- it is about thrift- it is about not wasting. Being cheap means spending as little as possible, and does not necessarily recognize the trade off between economy and quality. Frugality, on the other hand, leaves room to acknowledge that spending as little as possible may actually be just as wasteful as spending too much- because you get what you pay for, and if you are buying something of poor quality, your resources are being squandered. I am not disparaging the need to be cheap occasionally- after all, sometimes a little of that is required before we arrive at financial stability. But frugality offers a much richer ground for personal growth and good stewardship of resources- ours, and the world's.
When I set out on the topic of frugality, I thought I was in for a lesson on spending less money. What I came away with was a lesson on how I spend my time.
There is always a trade off between time and money. Convenience is truly something we pay for, and is now accounting for a majority of even our grocery dollars. Convenience often determines how often I put gas in my car- am I willing to stick it out and find creative ways to meet our needs if something at the store was forgotten? I even find that a lack of managing my time frugally leaves me feeling unsatisfied and craving outside distraction and entertainment... which often means spending more money. Idleness (such as when I was laid up on the couch with morning sickness) and its uglier cousin, laziness (which implies more personal responsibility than simply being idle, which may have due cause) translate into a rather empty feeling inside. Oh yes, we all need some relaxation and down time- but when we are downright unproductive, things don't feel right.
As mothers of little ones, productivity can hardly be measured in the actual volume of work we accomplish- rather, it is in the art of making each moment count. Being productive is being mindful, focused, and meeting the needs that present themselves to us, no matter how inconsequential they may seem in the grand scheme of things. My goal in all of this is to continually check in with myself- what need is presenting itself to me right now? Having paper nearby to capture fleeting reminders of things to be dealt with in the near future helps me focus on the present without distraction from the future- so does having a routine.
Ultimately, I have learned that "frugality" is not getting factory-farmed chicken breasts on sale for 99c per pound-it is getting the whole chicken and using each part so that nothing is wasted (roast chicken, bone broth, liver pate, and schmaltz). Frugality may not be running to the salvation army for new clothes, but rather weeding out the clothes I dislike so that when I approach my closet, there may be less, but everything I see is appealing (incidentally, since I followed Regina Leed's advice on organizing a closet by *color*, it not only looks beautiful, but it is much easier to make up my mind on what to wear each day- colors tend to reflect mood and I am immediately drawn to what jives with my mood).
Frugality is about adding quality to my life, by putting my creativity and intuition to use in how I manage my resources and make the most of each moment. It is about generating little to no waste- making the most of every moment, possession, and purchase.
